I’m a people pleaser, at the end of the day it’s that simple. I enjoy helping people and making people happy. Since I was a little blonde haired boy of 4 pretending to be a Ghostbuster so I could save people from ghosts to the bearded 31 year old man I am today it’s always been part of my DNA.
I care too damn much sometimes and it gets me in trouble. Sometime I put too much of my heart into someone or something and I get burned. Now don’t get me wrong of all the problems I could have helping people is not one I am complaining about. I’d much rather get hurt trying to help someone than anything else in this world.
Yet there is a lesson I am beginning to learn that there is a line between helping people with who you are or helping people by being who they want you to be. This is where today’s blog starts… owning who YOU are.
It’s time for you to give up this notion that you have to be ANYTHING other than what you are. Consider your life, how many times have you tried to be someone else or performed actions because a friend, loved one or family member wanted you to be that person or do that thing?
Did it serve you? Did it truly serve them?
There is a great quote from the last Rocky movie where Rocky Balboa is giving an impassioned speech to his son and he says
Now if you know what you’re worth then go out and get what you’re worth. But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain’t where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody!
That is what you need to do in life. Know what YOU’RE worth… stand up for what YOU are… for WHO you are. It doesn’t matter if most of the people in your life or the people in the world in general don’t understand you at first. I promise you there are people out there that not only understand it they are actually waiting for you to be that person.
The power of owning who you are and not being lost in a crowd of people boils down to one fact, you stand your ground. You know exactly who or what you want and where you want to go. You are making the decisions and you REFUSE to allow anyone to keep you from getting there.
I was talking with a friend today about a guy who liked her and who she liked. Let me preface the story by saying my friend, Lisa, is one of the best women I know on the planet. She’s an absolute catch, pretty, intelligent, caring… just plain awesome.
Anyway, Lisa is over dating “boys” and this guy asked her away for a weekend with him and a number of mutual friends. On the one hand Lisa wants to go because A.) she likes Rick and B.) she likes all the friends that are also going to be there. On the other hand, Lisa wants to date a man and have a boyfriend.
What is she to do? To me there are two options. One, she could decide to go on the weekend and be in this situation where she’s with the guy she likes but also her friends and it’s not really clear does he really like me? Or is he just trying to hook up with me?
Two, she could say to herself “NO! I am a sexy, intelligent and independent woman and I KNOW I’m a catch. I refuse to be put in this situation of questioning Rick’s intentions” and then go to Rick and turn down his offer and let him know that if he wants HER he has to treat her for the person that she is worth.
Basically she needs to stand up for herself and who she is. This belief and approach to life can take root in pretty much any situation. For it always comes down to being who you are.
There is power in that. There is power in you. When you start to stand up for that vibrant soul inside your chest… the amazing person that YOU are; the world will bend and morph to meet your new expectations.
To get what you want in your life you don’t need to change to meet the world… you instead have the world change to meet you.
So OWN your own value. Stand up for who YOU are and go out and GET what you are worth!